My Journey with Empathy First: A Personal Reflection

by Larissa Kimungui

(Larissa spent 6 weeks with Empathy First as a Commsgrad Intern working on Social media marketing. She did a brilliant job with her beautiful and insightful posts. This is her reflection ... )

Over the past 6 weeks, I've been an intern at Empathy First, and I can honestly say it's changed how I think about leadership and what it actually means to connect with people. When I first started my internship, I thought I had a pretty good understanding about empathy. I mean, who doesn't think they're a caring person, right? But working alongside the incredible Leanne Butterworth has really transformed how I understand what empathy actually looks like in action, especially for those who are in a position to influence and guide others.

One of the things that struck me most about Empathy First is how Leanne managed to take something that can feel a bit…saccharine and make it incredibly practical and actionable. Before this experience, I probably would have rolled my eyes a little at "empathy training". It sounds like something that should come naturally, doesn't it? But I learned there's a huge difference between feeling sorry for someone and actually understanding their position well enough to respond in a way that's genuinely helpful. Throughout the work ‘ve done over the last few weeks, as well as the feedback I received from Leanne on how to better improve my approach to communicating the necessity of empathy, I’ve really learned how important the work she does is in helping others, especially leaders, develop a deeper understanding of what empathy is and isn’t.

The research backing up what Empathy First teaches is extremely compelling too. During my time here, I spent quite some time diving into studies and articles that showed how empathetic leadership actually improves retention, reduces workplace conflict, and even boosts productivity. It turns out that when people feel genuinely understood and valued, they're not just happier; they're also more creative, more willing to take productive risks, and more likely to go the extra mile when it really matters.

But one of the most profound lessons I’ll be taking with me is my newfound understanding that empathy in leadership isn't purely about being everyone's friend or avoiding difficult decisions. Throughout all the research I conducted during my time here, I realised that I had been conflating empathy with agreement, thinking that to be empathetic, I had to validate every perspective or avoid pushing back on ideas I disagreed with. Interning at Empathy First taught me that one can deeply understand and acknowledge people’s viewpoint while still maintaining their own position or making decisions others might not like

Most importantly, I also learned that empathy comes in different shades and colours. Early on in my internship, I was working on a piece about small empathetic actions leaders can do in their interactions with employees, and I included a suggestion about making eye contact in conversations to show engagement. Leanne gently pointed out that this might not be appropriate for everyone, as some people may find eye contact uncomfortable or even distressing, and a lack of it doesn’t necessarily mean they’re disinterested. It was a small comment, made almost in passing before we moved on, but it’s stayed with me ever since. It really made me realise how easy it is to default to our own perspectives, and how powerful it can be to pause and consider someone else’s experience. That idea that “maybe this isn’t about me; maybe I should try to understand where they’re coming from”, has genuinely shifted how I’ve approached my interactions, both professionally and personally. This small moment was truly when I started learning how important it is to practice being more empathetic.

As my time here progressed, it truly shifted how I think about my own leadership potential, as well as my day-to-day interactions with other people. I used to worry that caring too much about others' feelings would make me less effective or make me too much of a pushover. Now I understand that the opposite is true. The leaders who have the most impact are the ones who can connect with people as human beings while still working toward important goals. They create environments where people want to do their best work because they feel genuinely valued and understood. And as a soon to be graduate, this is the kind of leader I know would positively shape and nurture my career growth as I properly enter the workforce.

As my internship comes to an end and I prepare to graduate, I'm looking at job opportunities and workplaces through a completely different lens now. I find myself asking questions I probably wouldn’t have before: How do leaders here actually treat their people? Is empathy just a buzzword on their website, or is it something they genuinely practice? I know I want to work somewhere that values the kind of leadership Empathy First has shown me, where empathy isn’t just a slogan, but something that’s reflected in everyday conversations, decisions, and organisational culture.

I'm leaving Empathy First not just with new skills, but with a clear understanding of the kind of leader I want to work for and eventually become myself.

I have so much gratitude for Leanne and my time here, and I’m very excited to continue putting into action what this experience has taught me.

Larissa Kimungui.

Thank you Larissa!! It's been great working with you and I wish you every success!

Want your team to experience the kind of shift Larissa did?

 Let’s explore how empathy training can make that happen.

 📩 leanne@empathyfirst.com.au

🌐 www.empathyfirst.com.au/workshop-enquiry